Let’s talk about Geo, a grown adult who has decided that the best use of his time is pretending to be a minor online. That’s right, Geo has taken the universally cherished experience of being an awkward, hormonal teenager and turned it into his personal performance art piece. Because apparently, paying bills and facing adulthood weren’t cringe enough for him.

Now, before you ask, “Why would someone do this?”—we don’t have a good answer.  Maybe it’s the thrill of role-playing without the dice. Maybe it’s an elaborate coping mechanism for avoiding responsibility. Or maybe Geo just gets a kick out of fooling people. Or maybe he wishes to be with one? Either way, this man-child has perfected the art of digital regression, one cringeworthy interaction at a time.

But here’s where it gets weird. Geo’s behavior isn’t just a harmless quirk—it’s deeply unsettling. His juvenile antics blur boundaries in ways that make others uncomfortable, leaving them to wonder: Who even is this guy? Geo may act like a minor, but he’s anything but innocent.

And let’s not forget the audacity. When confronted about his antics, Geo doesn’t apologize; he deflects, doubles down, or throws in a half-hearted excuse like, “I was just joking!” (Disclaimer: he hasn't said anything about this yet, BUT HE WILL.KEEP PRESSING HIM) 

At the end of the day, Geo might think he’s playing some clever character, but the truth is, he’s only fooling himself. To everyone else, he’s just a grown man avoiding the one thing he can’t pretend away: accountability.

Geo, if you’re reading this (and we know you are), it’s time to log off, grow up, and stop treating the internet like your personal Neverland. The rest of us have enough to deal with without playing guess-who with a wannabe Peter Pan.